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All Reviews by Zippy
 from There's Something About Jack #12
Studio: West Coast

Funny As A Crutch

you know what makes me laugh? when porn actors try to be funny--or try to act. this "jack" guy can't do either. he should just be happy he's got a biggun. and why does everybody think snow is so hot? she ain't. felony is the biggest draw here--and that ain't sayin' much. oh...and the cumshots sucked.


 from Dinner Party, The
Studio: Adam & Eve

Sit Down For A Spell

Asia Carrera makes my phalange so hard I could play croquet with it. Plus you get Celeste and Julie Ashton in the same deck. Good scenes and fair cinemadirectography make this worth viewing. If you don't like Carrera, check yourself into the fag funnyfarm.


 from Blue Girl from Planet XXX
Studio: Erotic Angel

Yeecchhh!

i only rented this because a) it's got charlie in it, and b) i dig seeing former playmate weigel take it in the face.(for this i recommend "angelique.") well, none of the scenes were worth a hoot. and, yes, the background "music" was annoying.


 from Throat Gaggers #3
Studio: Red Light District

Pre-Model Deepthroating

This whole series is pretty lame. But this installment did manage to include an impressive beauty. Her name is Diana--aka Princess Diana, aka Persian Princess Diana. She did several porn flicks before retiring to become a major Norwegian fashion model. Her real name is Aylar Dianati Lie. Her story can be found on wikipedia.


 from 18 And Nasty #11
Studio: T.T.B. Productions

Tera Sells Coffee!

T.P. going door-to-door selling coffee? Geez...is there anything she can't do? This is worth seeing mostly for her scene, although the camera work and production is shoddy. Tera gets my vote for sexiest pornette to A) Have a long career, and B) Doing gutsy scenes. Like taking it in the mouth. She does that a lot.


 from Angelique
Studio: Wicked

For Weigel Fans Only

this flick is recommended for fans of teri "silicon valley" weigel. the former playmate doesn't disappoint here despite a wacky sorta artful storyline. i gave it 3 stars because she takes it in the face twice. pity she didn't do more facials in her earlier films--or one, even.


 from Sensual Exposure
Studio: Studio A

O'dell Is Swell

good flick overall. kelly o'dell is one of the most underrated sirens in stag history. she's a petite blonde cutie who performs admirably under prurient conditions. check her out in "deep inside: kelly o'dell." blake has a knack for birdcalling the hotter females in the biz. his direction tends to be too artsy, but he has an eye for symmetry. you see? i'm not all mouth shots and facials!


 from Corruption Of Christina, The
Studio: Wicked

Sparxx Ain't A-Flyin'

I'm giving this thing an extra star because of its good production quality. That being said, this is PJ before she lost her hotness. Good. It's also PJ in one b/g sex scene, and not a great one. Bad. She spends most of the film being a peepin tom. Bad. So to sum up this rental--bad.


 from Little Lace Panties #5
Studio: Digital Sin

False Advertising

Have you ever rented a porno with a hot-looking chick on the box cover, only to watch the flick and discover that she ain't all that hot after all? Kinda like those fast food T.V. ads, huh? Hello, Cameron! Actually, Taylor Rain almost saves this horrid atrocity--being the best-looking girl. But not quite. The sex scenes are lame and poorly shot, too. Ouch!


 from Best Of North Pole #1
Studio: New Sensations

Pretty Girls, Trippy Camera

this is the usual peter north recipe: pretty girls and sh*tty camerawork. here's an idea: stop with the close-ups. pan out on facials so we can see the actress's actual face. cut back on elongated "cock-in-pussy" shots. in other words, highlight the actress. out.


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